Sexuality as a Key to Purpose

This Sheet is a part of the Maniphesto 40 Day Challenge. More information and sign up on , soon)

What is the link between sexuality and purpose? How can not ejaculating possibly help you to figure out what to do with your life? And what is needed to make sure that the energy from not ejaculating is out to good use?

These are the questions we will attempt to answer in this knowledge sheet. It is also the foundation and philosophy behind the challenge and our approach. So read carefully and please ask questions if there is anything you do not understand.

How to succeed on this challenge

To make the shifts we are advocating in this challenge, you will need three elements:

  1. Willpower and determination will get you started. And they will be sure to fail at some point if you rely solely on them.
  2. The support of a supportive community will carry you through difficult times and lift you when you inevitably fall or have a miss. No man is an island and you will not make it alone.
  3. In the long term, you need to shift your focus from “”trying not to ejaculate”, to a deeper sense of purse. This is the same as channelling your sexual energy into “fucking the world” through everything you do in your life. This will enable you to become the kind of person who can generate the energy to be a pillar of support for others, in any connection.

It is especially the third point here that we will be investigating in this Knowledge Sheet.

Sexuality as a key to Purpose

At Maniphesto, we work with men and their sexuality to support their sense of purpose.

Discovering and living with purpose is the greatest challenge that you will face in life. Purpose is not something that you can discover in a day, but will unfold over the rest of your life.

As a man, Your sense of self is connected to your role – the work you do. And if you are a free man, your choice of work stems from your desires. The roots of your desire are in sexuality. So, as a man, mastering your sexuality is the key to knowing who you are, why you are here, and what you are supposed to do with yourself.

So, the question is: Have you mastered your sexuality, or are you it’s slave? Is your sexual desire aggravated by shame, selfish neediness and emptiness? Or is your sexual energy fully harnessed and directed towards your mission of fucking the world open with your gifts?

The key to answering that question can be found in your experience to your own everyday life. So take a moment to consider, and rate yourself on a scale of 1 – 10 (1 = not at all; 10 = fully). No one else is going to see your answers, so be honest:

  • How much passion do you feel for your everyday life?
  • How much are you doing things which are intimately connected to a deep sense of meaning for you?
  • How much are you filled with a sense of mission which give you absolute clarity on what you should be doing every day?

The higher you answer, the more likely that you are further on the path of mastering your sexuality. You are correctly channeling your sexuality towards that which is most important for you. The lower your answers, the more likely it is, that your sexuality is curtailed, limited, that you are serving it and its needs, instead of putting it to your service.

At Maniphesto, we support men to understand the nature of their sexual desire and direct it towards purposeful action in the world. Now we have created The 40 Day Challenge, to share what we have learnt with you.

The benefits of non-ejaculation

The benefits of abstaining from ejaculating are well known. Elite sportsmen typically avoid sex in the time leading up to a big performance. Science has shown that there is a spike in testosterone levels after about one week, and related boosted physical energy levels.

But this is just the tip of the iceberg. A good image to represent what is happening is to imagine that you have a power plant in your bodily base which steadily builds up your libido, or life energy. Regular ejaculation is a way of releasing that energy. If you are doing that in front of a screen watching pornography, you are literally squirting your life energy into a piece of tissue paper every day. If you do not ejaculate, then that energy is going to need to go somewhere else. That is where the idea of purpose comes in.

The intention of this challenge is to learn to conduct and channel your sexual energy towards living a life of deeper purpose. Not ejaculating will mean that there will be a lot more energy available. It is a part of your nature to strive upwards, to contribute and to express your gifts. So in a sense, as you set out on this journey, you can trust yourself to automatically know which way is “up”. And you can be sure that there will be all kinds of leaks, distractions and temptations that will cause problems.

That is where the need for community comes in. Sexual energy can be chaotic and uncontrolled in its nature. As you head off on this journey, you will be meeting sides of yourself that you are not familiar with. Being in regular, honest contact with other men, who have made the same commitment to learning to channel their sexual energy towards something more meaningful is a necessary ingredient to ensuring a good passage.

The best kinds of communities will entail men who have the explicit intention to inspire and lift each other. This is done by creating a clear shared hierarchy of values orientated towards meaningful contribution to others. As with all hierarchies, there will be competition. But men competing over genuine contributive engagement is a very positive dynamic which lifts the whole as well as the individual man.

Your Journey to Purpose

It is important to recognise that every many is on a different point on his journey, and there are no simple comparisons. One man may continue to fall into the temptation of watching pornography and ejaculate multiple times throughout this 40 day challenge, but experience major transformation and connection to purpose in his life. Another man might abstain completely from all kinds of sexuality and find himself even more grey and disconnected from his passion at the end of 40 days.

Of course we cannot guarantee any specific result. What we do guarantee, is that if you:

  1. Give your best effort with the willpower you have available
  2. Communicate with the community about your ups and downs
  3. Use the some of the time and energy that comes available to reflect on your sense of purpose and meaning in life

Then you will gain a deeper knowledge of yourself which will have a long term influence in moving your life in a positive direction – from sexual slavery towards sexual mastery, and towards a greater sense of passion, meaning and mission in everything that you do.

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